Living is letting go

I am currently grappling with a few things about myself that I need to be able to control and release. I am the ripe old age of twenty-six now, and that means that I need to really start actualizing what Adult Stepper is going to be like (and yes, I think Stepper can follow me into adulthood within my social circles). Being able to step back and take inventory of what is working and what is not is a trait that is necessary for a mature and responsible person.

I think that the Minnesota Twins could benefit from some solid self-reflection as well. You didn't think this entry would be without a baseball metaphor, did you? After watching The Cisco Kid implode again in short innings, unable to get an out, fanning the flames pitch after pitch, I made a realization that I believe several Twins fans have made. I had been thinking this for a while, but now that we may seem to actually have the resources I think we can go for it. Frankie, it's been real, but you need to either go to the 'pen and help us while you figure your shit out, or go all the way to Rochester and get back on the horse there for a while.

Swarly Swarzak is putting on a good show so far. He is setting records, keeping his calm, and taking command of the hill. These are things that you used to do Franchise, but I don't see that guy anymore. You let them cut out some of your confidence after that surgery, and that was a mistake. You may not have the completely sick slider anymore, but you are still a dominating figure. Don't give up on yourself.

Personally I think June is going to be a good opportunity for a break for you. We aren't going to need to lean on you versus The Cleve or Oakland, so take a little reflection time and get your shit in order. I know it is unconventional to send a starter to the 'pen for a few weeks, but I would miss you if you were gone, and anyone that can reduce the appearances by the Crain Train or El Gordo is welcomed by me.

Sidebar: Hey Joe Crede, I don't really have the energy or desire to e-berate you right now. Seriously though dude, a three day recovery is not necessary every time the ball touches you. You and Boom-Boom-Mau got hit in the hand the same day versus the Brew Crew. Which one of you sat out for three days and which one hit a pinch-hit bomb the next day? Carlos Gomez ran into a wall, then hit himself in the face with a foul ball (which is extremely difficult to do!) and stayed in the game. You seem to think that when the grounds crew changes the bases mid-game that is your cue to hit the showers after a job well done. Contusion = bruise, dumbass. Rub some dirt on it and get the hell back out there.

Oh, the things I am trying to work on in my own life is my militant tunnel vision that impedes my ability to see outside of my own opinions, causing me to be hard on my coworkers and difficult with my friends. I think it's going good so far, right?

ps- I roll to Wrigley in two weeks!

Don Johnson VII

I hit 21,000 miles on the old Versa this week, which means that my seventh album has officially dropped. 21K in 23 months isn't bad. I guess this three mile commute to work is coming in handy. Once Scooterville releases Scooter McGavin from the hostage repair situation I seem to be in, the mileage on DJ will drop even lower!

Anyway, here is the tracklist for DJ7

Get Out of My Dreams And Into My Car - Billy Ocean
Perfect Situation - Weezer
Sabotage - Beastie Boys
We Like Sportz - The Lonely Island
Motown Philly - Boys II Men
Jizz In My Pants - The Lonely Island
I Wanna Sex You Up - Color Me Badd
I'm On A Boat - The Lonely Island (feat. T-Pain)
Punch You In The Jeans - The Lonely Island
Big Poppa - Notorious B.I.G.
Mr. Carter - Lil Wayne (feat. Jay-Z)
Jockin' Jay-Z - Jay-Z
Heartless - Kanye West
Bye Bye Bye - NSync
Promiscuous Girl - Nelly Furtado (feat. Timbaland)
Return of the Mack - Mark Morrison
Cheated On Me - Gavin DeGraw
Always In Love - Graham Colton
Planning Permission - The Darkness
Blue Sunny Day - Jonathan Coulton
Africa - Toto

What I love about this track list is that it is so obviously stupid. I went with a lot of hip hop this time. I know I can't pull it off, but I listen to it because I like it, not because I look cool rapping. I do not look cool, but I do it anyway. The Lonely Island is funny, as all the kids these days know, but I am a sucker for a clever turn of phrase, so there you go. I'm on a boat mother fucker.

If you do not remember the song "Return of the Mack" I feel sad for you. It really is only awesome because no one has listened to it in 10 years. It was hilarious then and is hilarious now, and that is not what Mr. Morrison was going for... no child no!

I love Weezer. I didn't love them 10 years ago when I should have, but I love them now. Perfect Situation is not my favorite song, but it is the one I went with here because it is one of their songs for which I do not own the real album. I own Blue and Red, and Omernik let me copy Pinkerton. Can't get enough.

Blue Sunny Day is Jonathan Coulton's newest song. It is about a love-torn vampire pondering ending it all by going outside on the most beautiful day of the year. He doesn't specifically say "vampire," but we all know. If you are not a JoCo fan yet, you should be. I have converted Ryan, Omernik, Krefting, both Nealys, and Fiedler already. I can get you too. This dude rules. Listen to Skullcrusher Mountain, Millionaire Girlfriend, The Future Soon, and I Feel Fantastic and tell me I'm wrong.

Looking at this, I still feel like DonJohn 6 is a stronger album, but this is what is current with what I am listening to now. I saved a couple of tracks that didn't match these to feature on DonJohn 8, and it almost makes me want to drive to Alaska just so 24K gets here faster.

I feel like I need to continuously apologize for the rap songs, seeing as my only associate that likes it like I do is Pinto, and I almost never talk to him. Oh well, someday I'll do an all-rap karaoke session, bomb, and then be over it.

Ca-Silla Later!

I forgot about this blog until a couple of days ago. Nice, huh? I was full of such good intentions when I started this mess. Oh well.

My life has been a blur of work and Twins games. I feel like those are the only two things I have concentrated on or spent time with all spring. As a matter of fact, as soon as I finish this post I am headed to the lab to get a couple hours of work in before the Mother's Day Twins game with my Mom. What a great Sunday! Okay, on with the rant.

First of all I will assert that I am PUMPED about the Boom-Boom-Pow longball clinic being put on by our boys. The Mauer to Morneau back-to-back sensation is here to stay. Mauer got his man-strength this off-season. Have y'all noticed how much beefier he looks this year? For a dude with back issues he sure must have lifted a lot this winter. Keep 'em coming boys. Keep everyone afraid of the piranhas, and then BAM- shark attack.

Now down to the overly-specific baseball nitpick. That damned Delmon Young! I dogged him all year for his terrible defense, and since his offense was struggling to meet expectation as well, others started 2009 hating on him too. His offense has started off nicely, and he is not making as many obvious errors and blunders as last year, so I feel like people are easing up on him. DO NOT ACQUIESCE! I am going to explain to you why this dude still has no business in the outfield.

#1- No speed, no agility, and watching him try to pick up a ball that is anywhere near a wall or corner is too painful to even find a decent metaphor.

#2- This play happened last night (Saturday) versus the Mariners (Liraino v Hernandez). Ichiro is up in the 5th inning. I believe he led off, but there may have been 1 out. He battles with Liriano and finally half-swings himself a single to the right field gap. Runner on first with amazing speed, and a 3-run lead. Lopez steps into the box. Now obviously Liriano is going to use his off-speed and breaking pitches to try to induce a ground ball during this at-bat. Going after a right-handed hitter with heat will mean that decent contact will most likely be going to the opposite field. If Lopez hits a ball through the right side of the infield, Ichiro is on 3rd base in a heartbeat. We go after him with breaking pitches so that if a ground ball or liner gets through the infield, it will be to left field to hold Ichiro to 2nd.

The second pitch of the at bat is a slider that Lopez pulls to about 20 feet inside of the left field foul line. Where is Delmon? So far into the left-center gap that by the time he does his little mincing lady prance over to the ball Lopez is on second base and Ichiro has scored. Why the hell was he that far into the gap? If my tiny little girl head can figure that out while simultaneously competing in a putting contest, filling out a sudoku puzzle, and eating all the grapes in my dad's refrigerator then perhaps a professional outfielder who has obviously never had any other plan in life besides baseball should know how to position himself a little better in that situation.

Overall, I am obviously pleased by how my boys are coming together. I can't believe I waited this long to exclaim this, but Matt Tolbert is back! I never really wrote about my spring training trip, but Matty T was the star for sure. I am head over heals for that little hustler. Nick Punto 2.0 indeed! I still love Nicky, but with the two of them both up here holding down the middle infield I am really starting to envy second base.

Okay, off to work. Keep it real everyone.